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Sunday, 2 October 2016

HOW TO GET HER INTO A REAL INTENSE CONVERSATION: INCREASING THE BUBBLE



I was chatting with a colleague not too long ago – a fellow day gamer. He wanted to know how I got instant dates pretty much whenever I asked. He was having to really persist most of the time to get a girl to follow him, and instant dates were not very common for the guy.
Most of the time when we approach a girl, we'll find that she might have several different scripts that may be counterproductive to getting into bed with her that day. Only going for the women who have the same script as us is quite inefficient in the long run. This was one the main things I kept in mind when I was revamping my process at the start of this year.
So, after trying out several things, I've settled on a method that works best. Up until quite recently, instant dates were not a regular thing for me either. I would basically have to look for girls who were already somewhat attracted, and it would take a fair number of approaches to get any kind of regularity.
These days I can get it done efficiently with much less walking around and approaching woman after woman.
And more often than not, I can choose my woman from afar and get her to follow me on an instant date without a lot of hassle.
Today, I'm going to share my best tips for achieving this.

THE BUBBLE OF INTRIGUEBefore I get into the nitty-gritty and cover what exactly it is I say – and what you can say in your interactions with women – there are a few things you should be aware of.
The second most prevalent female sexual fantasy that almost all woman share is the desire to get together with a mysterious man – a man who she just can't seem to completely figure out. You see it again and again in movies, music, books, and TV shows. Each time she feels like she's getting close, he says something that makes her look at him in a completely different way. Again and again.
As seducers, we can mimic this in our interactions with women. You see, one thing I've found out time and time again, especially in the last several months, is if you get a woman to the point of intense curiosity – where she wants to hear your full story – not only will she try and stop you from leaving, she will also follow you somewhere else just to get a chance to figure you out.
This is what I and other seducers call the bubble of intrigue, or “hard bubble” for short. And before I progress things to an instant date, I make sure that this bubble is established.

PACING HER INTO YOUR REALITYSome weeks ago I met this  at the bus stop downtown (PH). Even though we'd just been talking for a couple minutes , she was already asking me casual questions. So she was a bit curious about me, but not quite curious enough to drop what she was doing at the moment and follow me somewhere else.
I needed to harden the bubble of intrigue – and quickly. Her bus could come at any moment and she'd have to leave in a hurry. So I had to pace her out of her agenda of catching her bus, and into my reality using nothing but my words. I should mention that this skill isn't really for beginners who are still working up the nerve to approach women. To pull this off, ideally you should have a fair bit of cold approach experience under your belt. The payoff is huge, but it is quite a complex form of frame control.
It is key to understand that there are several specific ways to do this. I learned a few more last month, in fact, but each has at least one thing in common. Once you understand these things, coming up with your own methods is quite simple. Here they are:
  • You set up the conversation so that she asks you questions. Make her curious first

  • You use your answers to demonstrate attractive qualities (there are several options to choose from: wise, deep, funny, sexual, etc.).

  • You answer her questions without fully answering them to maintain the intrigue.


    You give her an emotional story or scenario that her mind can fall into.

    • It needs to seem like you did this by accident. You don't want to appear like you're picking her up.

    If you can consistently inject these concepts into your conversations with women, it's at this point that you find that, more often than not, girls are all too happy to ditch their obligations and follow you elsewhere. And on top of that, you'll be in complete control of the direction of the conversation, which sets you apart from the majority of men that she'll ever meet.
    I understand that this is quite a lot to process in one go. It definitely took me a while to wrap my head around it. So I'll try to break it down as simply as possible. And I'll also share some examples.
    The girl at the bus stop, after I had made her a little bit curious about my background, asked me this question:
    “What made you move here?”You'll know that giving her a straight-up answer is actually counterproductive. And many day gamers will answer this question with a clever remark, or maybe something overtly flirty. While that's okay, if we want to consistently derail her script, we need something better than that.Here's what I said instead:“Well, I sort of got tired of seeing the same faces over and over again... so I decided it was time to take things in a new direction.”First of all, my answer did not provide any real clarification as to why I actually moved here. It could have been for work, for further education... it could even have been because they issued a warrant for my arrest back home. So the question of why I am here right now is still an unsolved mystery.And, on top of that, I provided an emotional scenario that almost everybody can relate to: a distaste for the status quo and a pursuit of the new and exciting.
    ALLOW HER TO “FEEL”As men, we typically tend to speak in a concise manner, centered on delivering facts. We like to talk about the who and what. Who did what? What happened exactly? Who was there? And so on. But to a woman, speaking this way is the equivalent of holding a blow dryer in front of her crotch, and setting it to high without any heat.;">Women are far more concerned with the how and the why. Just listen to a group of girls describe the events of the previous weekend. As men, we'd be thinking along the lines of “Can you just get to the POINT already?” because that's just how we prefer to communicate.
    It's no surprise that most women find most men boring from a conversational standpoint.>Women don't want us to just get to the point. Instead, they want to FEEL the emotions.
    So what we do as seducers is provide her with a story or a scenario that allows her to feel certain emotions. A interesting concept that rings true time and time again is as follows:Describe the emotion, and she will feel it. It really is that simple.One of the reasons that music is so popular is that a song can be chock-full of emotion, everything from love to anger, arousal to apathy. People want to escape the monotony of day-to-day life and just, even if it's for only a moment, slip into a place where nothing else really matters. Music allows us to do this, and don't get me started on TV shows and movies....So, if you can work a bunch of mini-stories charged with certain emotions and imagery into your conversations with women, you'll notice that the way they look at you starts to change, radically.Let me give you an example. Let's say we have two separate guys, both day gamers. And for simplicity's sake, we'll call them Joe and Pat. Now, Joe doesn't know a whole lot about intriguing women and using emotional imagery. But our friend Pat here is already quite adept at this particular skill. Here's how their conversations with women might look:Girl: So, what do you for fun?
    Joe: Well, when I'm not out of town clubbing with Wizkid, I like to take the time to chat up girls on the street.
    Girl: [laughs] Oh really? You know Wizkid?
    Joe: Oh yeah, we go way back, since his Univerisity Dropout album. I helped with a few of the songs.
    So, this is actually not too bad; it's funny and lighthearted. But, as we already know, drawing laughter is not really the best way to go about seducing her, unless of course she already finds you attractive. But anyone who's done day game for a while will know that this isn't always the case. So, for a higher chance of success, it's important for us to get her mind involved:
    Girl: So, what do you for fun?
    Girl: Of course I am... tell me!
    Pat: Okay... do you ever get those moments where you’re just having so much fun that you just completely lose track of time?
    Girl: Oh yeah... I remember once I was celebrating my sister’s birthday and we ended up partying until the sun came up! But what is it that you do for fun? I want to know.

    Right off the bat we can see a difference in the two interactions. At this point in the interaction, the girl still doesn't know what Pat does for fun. But because of the emotional scenario he provided her with, we can see that she already sees him in a different light. She's almost desperate to know just what Pat's story is. This is an example of hard bubble.
    Here's another example – from my interaction with the girl at the bus stop.
    Me: So, what's something you do that you REALLY enjoy?
    Her: I love to dance.
    Me: Cool... hmm. What is it about dancing that you like?
    Her: I just like being completely tuned out and feeling the music in my body.
    Me: I know what you mean... I'm not much of a dancer, but when I'm working on a portrait, there's a moment where I'm completely immersed in the moment. Time flies by and every bone in my body is focused on the canvas.
    Her: Yeah... I love that feeling. Are you an artist?
    I used another emotional scenario here in response to her story about what she feels like when she's dancing. It's always good to let women feel as though you share a couple similarities (but not too much... we still want to keep the intrigue up!).At the same time, I let the girl at the bus stop know (accidentally... or so it seemed) that I dabble in the visual arts. It's important that this seems like it came out by accident, because it's never good to brag, and it’s usually off-putting to show off your talents in a seduction. But if you can set things up where she just happens to naturally stumble on interesting facts about you, then this is very attractive.There are a lot more examples I could give, probably more than a dozen, but these should be enough to get you started. I wouldn't want to overwhelm anyone with too much information, since this is already a fairly advanced topic.Just remember the underlying concepts:
  • Continue to make her curious

  • Let her stumble on a new side of you

  • Don't answer her questions plainly

  • Allow her to feel emotions

  • Let all of this happen naturally

    • Pick one or two of these to work on for your next day game session. It would help to sit down and think up a few sentences you can use in the field. Perhaps you practice photography as a hobby, or have an interest in music. Actually taking the time to work these aspects of yourself into conversations while sticking with the underlying concepts will do wonders for your game.All the top verbal seducers, went through phases like these.Eventually you'll get to the point where it's automatic; you'll be doing all of these things without even thinking about it. And the times where you had to persist to get compliance will feel like a distant memory.
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    ONE LAST QUESTION...Back to the bus stop story... this girl and I ended up on a short adventure. She forgot about the fact that her mother was waiting for her back at home. She forgot about the fact that she was in a long-term relationship. In the moment, none of that even mattered. We took a bus together to a park uptown to “check out the scenery.”We sat on a bench, side by side, and she looked me right in the eyes, smirked, and leaned in towards me. She put her hand on my thigh and, in a quiet voice, asked me one last question: “Tell me, Femi... how often do you have adventures with girls?”I smiled to myself... as I really couldn't help it, since I already knew what I was going to say.
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